"That" Mom

It's official.  I'm that annoying mom.  I probably have been for a while, but a recent online purchase that was delivered to the house today confirms it (for me at least).





I ordered a pediatric otoscope.  That's right, a device to look in my kid's ear when I think he might have an ear infection.  Let's face it, I dropped the ball bigtime last month and I don't want it to happen again.  One of the pediatricians in the practice suggested a handy little thing called a "middle ear monitor."  While I could certainly see the usefulness of something like this, it's big claim is that it can give you an idea of the likelihood of there being fluid in your child's ear.  Well, Dane practically always has fluid in his ear because he has allergies.  What I really need to know is if I need to take him to the doctor to get a round of antibiotics.  I certainly don't want to take him if he's not in need of antibiotics, because all parents know that even if your child doesn't need them, he probably will after a visit there!  Exposing an asthmatic little one to more plague than absolutely necessary isn't on the top of my list.  And because he never runs a fever, acts strangely, or has a change in appetite when he gets an ear infection, someone has got to look in those ears!

Enter the "pocket" otoscope.  (I find the term "pocket" hilarious because as crazy as I might be, I am not toting that around in my pocket all day.)  I've debated the purchase for quite some time, but the recent congestion in our household finally sealed the deal.  We'll see how it goes.  I figure for the cost of one co-pay to the pediatrician, it's worth a little peace of mind.  And most of you know I love disgusting medical stuff anyway so it's right up my alley.

Like Mother Like Son

I belch like a man.  I don't do it in public, but anyone who knows me has probably heard it and wished they hadn't.  My mom always says "I thought I raised a lady" every time she hears it and my dad says something along the lines of "righteous".  I'm proud and ashamed at the same time.  Maybe a better way to explain it is that I'm ashamed that I'm so proud of this ability.

I taught Dane to stick green beans in his nose one night at dinner.  Not exactly just for the heck of it, but it did get him to eat his veggies that night.

I recently told Dane to say "Daddy, suck it" and he willingly repeated it.  Jonathan's reaction was worth the fact that we had to send Mommy to time out to show Dane that wasn't appropriate language.

The point of all this is to tell you that Jonathan is terrified that no one is going to believe that when Dane does this crap at school, it was Mommy who taught him.  So I guess this is me letting you off the hook, baby.  It's out there in the world.  When he gets sent to the principal's office for teaching the other kids how to burp, they'll know it's my fault.

In related news, Dane called the cat a "turd" the other night.  I wonder where he heard that.

Broccoli Cheese Soup Recipe

This is literally the best broccoli cheese soup I have ever had in my life.  It's amazingly simple and free from any of the "cream of" soups and pre-packaged crud people seem to be so desperately avoiding these days.  It started as a recipe from a co-worker.  I have no idea where she got the recipe, but I've modified it to perfection.  It is by no means light, but it's a perfect dinner for a chilly night with some rolls or (drumroll, please) a BREAD BOWL.  Oh heavens, the bread bowl.

Broccoli Cheese Soup

1/2 cup butter, softened
1/2 cup all purpose flour
8 cups chicken broth
2 (14 oz) bags frozen broccoli florets
1 onion, diced
1 tsp black pepper
1 cup heavy cream
4 cups shredded sharp cheddar cheese

Combine butter and flour with fork.

In large soup pot, combine broth, broccoli, onion, and pepper.  Bring to a boil over high heat.  Reduce heat and simmer for 20-25 minutes or until broccoli and onions are tender.

Add butter mixture, stirring until soup has thickened.  Slowly stir in heavy cream.  Add cheese 1 cup at a time, mixing well after each addition until cheese is melted.

I hope you enjoy it!

All You Need Is Love

Last night when I was bathing Dane, he decided to "swim" in the tub.  It was pretty darn cute, but I'm certainly biased.  Here was our conversation:

Dane:  "I'm swimming, Mommy!"
Me:  "Wow!  Where did you learn to swim like that?!"
Dane:  "Because I just am.  Because you love me, Mommy."

Woah.  Talk about a feel good moment.  Now, this isn't supposed to be a look-what-an-awesome-mom-I-am story.  I do the best I can, but there are moments when I feel like packing him up and sending him to Gramma's house.  Like tonight, when we were eating broccoli cheese soup (recipe here) and he tells me "I don't like broccoli.  I love broccoli.  Mommy, you made yummy soup.  Mommy, I don't like soup.  I only want bread."  It's just that I had this realization that if our kids know that we love them because we tell them a million times a day in words and gestures, then they can do anything.  And that makes you remember that yes, there are ten times minimum in day when you're frustrated to the point of tears, but your job is so worthwhile.  Your job is so important, the most important. And if your kids know you love them, you're doing it right regardless of the hundreds of things you've done wrong since the day of their birth.

The Short Version....

This was my day.  In light of recent circumstances that put everything into perspective, I was able to laugh at the day (and myself) and realize that it was just a bad day.  And not even a bad day, just an unorganized, poorly executed, nutty mess of a day.  I'll try to give you the short version story.

It started just after 5:30 this morning.  My car wouldn't crank.  This is completely my fault, like everything else today.  I knew that my key was wearing out about a year ago, but it hasn't been giving me any issues, and I didn't want to drive to the dealership in the next town to have a new key cut.  Well, we can call that poor choice #1 of the day.  This meant I had to wake up my family, get them dressed, take Dane to daycare and Jonathan to work, and get myself to work.... two hours late.

Once I get to work, I call the pediatrician's office to make an appointment.  Dane had been acting strangely on Thursday afternoon and Friday morning, but by the time I picked him up on Friday afternoon, he seemed back to his sweet self, so I figured I had nothing to worry about.  He's 2.  Two-year olds are moody.  Everyone knows this.  Plus, he never ran a fever and he's been eating and sleeping normally.  (You see what I'm doing here?  I'm already trying to explain away bad decision #2 -- not taking him to the pediatrician last week.)  Anyway, on Saturday afternoon I noticed some drainage in his ear.  He's had a ruptured eardrum before (on Christmas Day 2011) and it looked exactly like that.  I figured it was that again, and having been there before, I know there's not really much to be done but check to make sure the hole doesn't need to be patched.  Always preferring to take Dane to our pediatrician rather than sit in a waiting room with staph and flu and goodness knows what else, and the fact that he was back to his old self helped me make the decision to just make him an appointment today.

The pediatrician's appointment is scheduled for 3pm.  Perfect.  That leaves me enough time deposit my paycheck, drive to get my new key cut, go to the Sprint store to have them fix my phone (another thing I've put off for far too long), pick-up Dane from daycare and take him to the doctor.  Except I drive ten miles past the bank before I remember I need to go to the bank (dumb ass move #3). Turn around.  Make deposit.  Drive to dealership.  Get key cut.  Drive to Sprint.  The computer at Sprint was down so they couldn't process the insurance claim on my phone.  I tell them I need to leave to pick up my son for an appointment and they tell me to stop back by after his appointment.

At Dane's appointment, I'm asked which ear I spotted the drainage in.  I cannot for the life of me remember. I suddenly feel like one of those celebrity moms who leaves their child with a nanny all day.  Except I'm not skinny, stylish, or rich.  Erg.  I'm told he has a raging ear infection, complete with puss, and will need antibiotics.  I feel like a complete terd.  I've taken my child to the pediatrician for stupid nothings in the past and I miss when he actually needs to go.  Phooey on me.

I stop back my Sprint to process the claim on the phone, hit the pharmacy, and head home.  I get home at 4:30pm and decide to see if the new key fixes the car issue.  But the new key isn't anywhere.  I call the dealership.  They've been trying to reach me to tell me I left the key on the cashier counter (again, it's the next town over).  There's #4.

I think, "no problem". I'll run to the dealership with Dane and call to ask Jonathan to pick up something for dinner on his way home.  Dammit.  I have his car.  So at 4:30pm, I call Jonathan to tell him that I have to run to the dealership before they close to get my key (in the opposite direction of his work) and then I'll be there to pick him up.  The entire trip, Dane is hysterical, crying that he wants to go to Owen's house.  No changing the subject or lying about Owen not being home (again, phooey on me) will console him.

An hour later, family piled into the car, we head to Moe's to have an enjoyable meal.  When we get home, I fully expect to end this day on a high note by cranking up my car with the new key.  Except it doesn't crank.  Well, poop.

Love = Friendship + Fire

Today, I wore a 12 year old (what?!) Pan Dance (sorority formal) t-shirt for my walk.  As I was thinking about how long ago that was, I happened to remember that's the night I met Jonathan.  The shirt has the formal date on it (Oct 20, 2000) so I now know the exact date I met my husband.  Crazy.  I've known him over a third of my life.

By the way, in case you were wondering, he was playing video games in the ATO house.  We were introduced, he said "hey" and that was it.  No butterflies, no love at first sight.  I honestly only remembered his name because everyone called him by his last name, which is now our last name, and that's not an easy name to forget.

"Love is a friendship set on fire."  Jeremy Taylor (1613-1667)
We used this quote on our wedding favors.  It's hard to imagine life without him, and beyond strange to think that we almost never were.  Thank God for broken hearts.  :)

What's Up My Sleeve? (2)

Back in April, I wrote a post entitled "What's Up My Sleeve".  I had intentions to do another post of that nature much sooner-- not a full six months later.  Let's just say I'm not the most creative gal in the world and these brilliant ideas don't come to me too often.  But I do have a few I've been excited to share with you all!

Dog beds  I love my dogs.  However, they rarely (if ever) sleep in the bed with us.  So of course they have to have their own beds.  We've had a series of ugly, annoying, and/or bulky dog beds in our seven years of dog ownership.  My mom made us some really fantastic "dog sofas" a few years ago.  They were attractive and easy to vacuum but couldn't be deep cleaned easily and were quite large.  We couldn't take them with us anywhere and once Dane was born we just didn't have the room to keep them.  Not to mention the smell that just wouldn't go away after a while.  We replaced them with some fluffy, tufted little numbers that our dogs loved.  Unfortunately, they proved not to be very durable, could be washed but not dried, and impossible to vacuum all the little aggravating crevices.  I started researching all the options to replace our dogs' beds.  Being 7 and 9 years old, they needed something other than a pile of blankets, especially on our tile floors.  The best option for us looked to be a cot-style bed for dogs that ran about $70.  Jonathan and I talked about it and decided we would purchase some when the old ones gave out.  While in the baby/toddler section of Wal-Mart, I noticed that toddler cots are $25.  I looked at the weight limit -- 75 pounds.  It was perfect!  The dogs LOVE them.  They were cheap, come with a fitted sheet that can be machine washed and dried, and they fold up for travel!  Perfection.  (Cleveland agrees!)



Equate brand Proactiv  When I was pregnant my skin was perfect.  I am not even kidding.  I didn't have to wear foundation.  After pregnancy?  Holy hormones!  My skin was looking rough.  I have used Proactiv in the past and had good results, but it's expensive and you can't just buy it in any ol' store.  While looking for something to combat my "welcome to motherhood" gift from mother nature herself, I stumbled across Wal-Mart's version of Proactiv.  (What is UP with me and Wal-Mart lately?  I swear I only go once every other month, but I guess there are just some things you can only find there!)  Anyway, it's insanely cheap and my skin is looking much healthier.  My wallet is happy and so are my pores.




Moroccan oil knockoff  My hairdresser (back before I became too cheap and began cutting my own hair) uses Moroccan Oil treatments on my hair.  It smells like heaven and it does wonders for my hair.  It ought to at around $40 a bottle.  Although I love the results, I was unable to convince myself to spend that kind of money on hair oil.  Thankfully, I like the results of Garnier's Moroccan Sleek just as much.  You can find it at Target for $5.  It smells great and has made growing out my very dry hair more pleasant.  I use it before drying my hair and after styling.  My only complaint is that the packaging is poorly designed and it's easy to get way more than you wanted.  "Hello.  My name is Melissa and I did brush my hair with a pork chop this morning.  Thanks for noticing!"  Anyhow, just keep this in mind and you'll love it as much as I do.



Dry erase marker  Ok, you're right.  I didn't discover the dry erase marker.  But my husband did come up with a brilliant new way to use it, especially if you're a parent.  Our son has asthma.  When it flares up, we have trouble remembering what time we gave him allergy medicine and breathing treatments.  So we write it on the mirror in his bathroom where we already keep all his medications.  Everyone who has ever had a sick child knows how difficult it can be to remember when you last gave him ibuprofen.  Sleep deprivation from aforementioned sick child being up all.night.long doesn't help matters.  Thanks, brilliant hubby!  Parents everywhere (especially me) will thank you!

I hope you can find at least one thing that would be useful to you in this post.  If not, maybe What's Up My Sleeve 3.0 won't take six more months! :)