Perspective

I was washing a load of laundry this evening while Dane and Jonathan played on the bed.  Dane was playing with Jonathan's wedding ring, taking it on and off of Jonathan's hand, and I overheard Jonathan say "the ring goes on this finger because I love Mama very much."  Melt.my.heart.  What a fantastic lesson for our son to learn.  And I'm not talking about marriage.  Two people that love one another and are committed to one another sharing the joys and sorrows of raising a child together -- that's what I am talking about.  I am so very blessed to have someone to share this parenthood journey with.  Heck, it's tough with two parents; I don't envy those who have to go it alone.

It got me thinking about all those who I don't think are doing a very good job of parenting.  Do I judge you when you breast feed your 4 year old?  Yes.  Do I think you're being irresponsible for turning your 1 year old around in his car seat?  Yes.  Do I think you're being a lazy parent when your four year old is sucking on a pacifier and still in diapers.  Absolutely.

But really, none of it matters.  I know that I make decisions that others don't agree with.  Despite our best efforts, Dane began watching TV before 2 years old.  It was the only thing we found that could get him to sit still for his breathing treatments at 8 months old.  At that point, breathing treatments were more important than his not watching TV.  Am I proud of it?  Nope.  Dane also had to be formula fed.  I hated that and still feel a lot of guilt (22 months after the fact) that I was unable to fulfill this need for him.  I'm sure I got some glares from well-meaning breast feeders everywhere.  What they didn't know is that I have a physical reason that I could not produce enough milk for my son, due to reconstructive surgery I had at 16 years old.

I'm sure the mother of the four year old still in diapers has a good reason as well.  I'm still going to think she's nuts for changing the diaper of a kid who can probably read and write.  I'm still going to give my husband the "wtf?!" eye when I see a parent giving their kid Mountain Dew or sweet tea in a sippy cup.  I will always believe that there is a right and a wrong way to do things and that there isn't a whole lot of gray area, especially when it comes to parenting.  But if you've got two loving parents who treat their child(ren) with kindness and respect, you're 95% of the way there anyway.